Why do we even bother with love, another one of the classic, chicken, or egg question? We humans have graced the planet since 100s of years now, have we learned nothing? Or have we learned everything that is, and our existence justifies the screw-ups, wars, and havoc we have wreaked on the planet. The widespread pandemic has just explained how we are nothing on the face of the extreme calamity. Just a little virus has shut us down, isolated, and made us all take shelter in our little hives.
Coming back to the question in hand, why do we fall in Love. Here, before the grammar Nazis start attacking me, let me clarify that I consider Love to be a noun rather than a verb. At least that is how it will be with respect to this text’s context. Love here is the boyfriend that suddenly comes in, but we don’t know whether it has the potential to be the husband, with all the boxed checked and expectations met. Love comes equipped with beautiful music, i.e., lust, sense of humor, and rugged manliness. All the qualities which make any woman want to rip out her clothes and ride the man.
This phase lasts for maybe a couple of months, with good food, fair manners, the Love will seduce, make itself so addictive that life seems to be just not worth living without the daily hit. It has the capacity to leave one all hot and bothered, and the next minute cold and distant, as it gauges your capabilities and your ability to sustain it. Enjoy this phase, since this might be the only time you might be pleasured, pampered, and cared for in your relationship cycle. Wine-dine, experience the pleasure of knowing someone intimately, yet not knowing them altogether; the mystery is simply alluring. There will be a stage wherein you will want to stay together; it’s the Love against the world phase.
So, you’ll make the mistake of moving in, and marry in the case of Indians, Arabs, and other countries where marriage is the only way maybe you can enjoy intimacy without the society condemning you. Love knows it’s here to stay, and the relationship now is that of a committed one. So, as you are introduced to your partners’ daily habits, quirks, as they openly shave, poo, and pee around you, the Love is amused. The mystery, drama and passion have taken back seat, eh sorry, have left the station or maybe packed their bags awaiting departure. You notice all those little things about each other, which you didn’t want to be aware of. Oh dear, he is funny, but the fun doesn’t get the housework done. Ah, she has a fine ass, but seems to be a little slow, isn’t she? Man, I am too tired to have sex or, in some cases, too much sex.
Love is fading away; well he has better things to do than keep up the spice in intimate life. Arguments creep in as the armpit itching and bathroom shaving has begun out in the open paving way to the Love’s little cousin, Disgruntle! All the flaws are laid wide out in the open; she’s fat, he’s bald, god he farts, damn she’s got a sharp tongue. Here’s when the statement starts, ‘I did not sign up for this! I cannot deal with this anymore.’ Disgruntle takes center stage as it shows all the faults, negatives, mamma’s boy/girl, narcissist, possessive s-o-b, lazy ass, heavy procrastinator, abuser, and stupid. Plain stupid, Girl, you could have sensed this a mile away, but Love clouded your judgment with all the exciting jazzy stuff. Love has gone away now, for good, so what do they do now? Pack up and move out.
This is how Love, for lack of a better word, f**ks up your life. Gives way to Disgruntle, and you start questioning all the significant decisions in your life, post, and pre-Love Era. The concept is simple before you fall in for all the Love and exciting stuff, think this through. Every time you prepare to free-fall into a relationship, it might very well end up in a disaster. Be prepared, better yet write down the pros and cons, including the dick and boob size, so that you might end up with an unbiased verdict. Fall in Love, but beware falling into the honey trap set up by some very skilled hunters. Very soon, you’ll not only be the subject of Disgruntle but also be one of the most bitter humans ever to walk on earth, at least till you meet your next Love.
If you had your very own tale of how Love gave way to Disgruntle, please let me know in the comments. Someday, I’d like to share my story, where we can sit around with a tub of ice cream or maybe ice cubes and therapize our shared similar individual agonies.